What A Girl Really Wants...

I often hear women complaining about the lack of good men. But honestly, is that really the case? I think it's debatable. I personally know of a lot of good guys that are interested in being in loving and serious relationships. The problem is the women that they come across say they want one thing but their actions speak differently. 

Women are quick to say how they want a nice guy with a cool job, goals, can hold an intelligent conversation and knows how to "keep it real". When asked about looks, these same women usually respond "looks aren't really all that important to me." However, when they come across this type of guy, they don't know how to appreciate a good thing. They're often more concerned with what their friends and their friends' boyfriends are doing
.

For instance, let's take "Ray". He's a hard-working guy with goals and a plan on how to achieve them. He doesn't make much money but his bills are paid and his credit is decent. He drives an older model car but it's clean and the tags are up-to-date. He doesn't smoke and only drinks every so often. He has two kids by two different women but no "baby momma drama". To sum it all up, he handles his business and is focused on steadily moving forward in life.

Now Ray meets "Nicole". Nicole says all the right things and seems to see the big picture. She pledges to support him in his ambitious pursuits. Everything seems great...at first. Soon though, Nicole is complaining about how much time Ray spends working and trying to achieve his goals. She says, "People can make time for what they really want to make time for." Never mind the fact that there are only 24 hours in a day. And no matter how much he might like to, there is no way for Ray to put a 25th or 26th hour on the clock.

So what starts to happen is now, instead of being a pillar of comfort and support, Nicole has become more of a hinderance to what Ray is trying to accomplish. Still, Ray tries to make it work even as Nicole's dissatisfaction becomes more and more apparent. He does all of this to the point of forgoing much needed sleep or time spent working on his goals. But, alas, it is all for naught because Nicole eventually leaves Ray in pursuit of a newer "Ray". One that has a lot more time available to spend with her. This scenario sound familiar??

So what happened? Ray was everything she asked for and still he wasn't good enough! And why not? I'll tell you why not...

The problem is that while Nicole was busy pointing out all the things she wanted in a man, she failed to realize that a man who possessed those qualities would be hard at work, trying to make his dreams reality...and this all takes time. Time that he'll be unable to spend with her. Because there is just no way to be in two places at once. It's simply physically impossible!...And trust me, I've tried...The only things that end up happening are a lot of arguing and fingerpointing.

Ladies, the bottom line is this: You can't ask for a man that works hard and is driven to be successful, only for you to turn around and complain about the amount of time he commits to accomplishing this goal. It's not fair to him or yourself. Be honest and realistic about what you really want and are able to handle. You'll save yourself a lot of heartache and time wasted on doomed relationships. If you want a ready-made man, then say that. Especially if you know you don't have the necessary patience required to survive the ups and downs and setbacks that occur when you're in a relationship with a GOOD MAN working on becoming a GREAT MAN.

But then again, what the hell do I know? Because as always, these are...

...JUST MY OBSERVATIONS